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Thursday, July 4, 2024

Hit and Run 6.30.24

     Life has it up and downs. Mine has been total chaos for at least 2 weeks. First chasing a Emu in the middle of the night, Then the cows just bust down the fence when they want out. Hell they bust it down when they want in. The land is so wet the post won't hold and the cattle panels are so bent up they won't be straightened out at all.  

    One day I hear cars honking and run to the door to see the cows in the road and traffic stopped in both directions.  I throw on my shoes and run to the garage to grab the golf cart.  The cows have got so strong I am powerless to move them. I tie a rope on them and tie the other end to the golf cart and off we go. They can be so stubborn that they just put on the four legged brakes and the cart will just spin its wheels or stop all together. Now they are food motivated so I grab some grain to keep them following the cart as I am pulling them along.  Folks have jumped out of their cars to help as some of them are needing to catch the ferry.   One cow in the yard one cow running back to the road. Then the horse and goats decided to get in on the fun. What a shit show it was. The goats where chasing me to get the grain and the cows where running from me so they could run free. I finally captured one and was dragging  it back to the pasture when we got close he made me dump the grain all over the cart. I got him up to the gate and he went in with a little resistance.  By then the horse came into the yard and so did the other cow.  Traffic moved on and off I went to get the other cow. The goats keep trying to get the spilled grain  and keeping them off the cart so I could get the cow was exhausting.  I made it to the gate with the cow using his braking power and goats trying to jump on. I  park right in front of the gate so I did not have too far to drag the damn cow.  As I was trying to get one in the other was shoving me to get out when  Wham O the goats had jumped on the cart and hit the peddle and I got run over with the golf cart. What can I say about being hit with my own golf cart. I screamed so many cuss words the goats ran off. Good thing the damn cart is electric and stopped as soon as the goat ran off.  My foot got run over and I twisted my knee. I just knew this was how I was going to end my life. I crawled out of the mud and stood up and realized nothing was broken.  Oh and now the cows are out again. 

    As I walked back to the house licking my wound a song came to mind.

It's a Goat, my Lord, in a flat bed cart slowing down to run me over. This island would have some good laughs for a long time after that. 



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